There are people who love children, then there are people who really don’t like them.
I used to be one of those people that didn’t like children. It shames me to admit this but I really couldn’t stand the little rugrats. Since I am an only child and my little cousin who lived with me was born when I was seven…I’d never been around babies much.
My husband and I have been together since I was 15 years old so we have grown up together. However, when we heard crying babies on the subway or bus or even in a restaurant we would get extremely annoyed and try to run away from them. We didn’t understand why they had to be so loud! The screeching alone made us want to climb the walls. In this pic I am 23, one year before we got married. I also had not discovered the wonders of eyeliner. 🙂
Fast forward to last week. I was in the gym locker room insanely early. So early that it was only 3 of us getting ready for work. The other two women were friends and were having a very loud conversation about parenting. What else did I have to do but listen?
They talked, with great irritation, about how much they absolutely hated the notion of having kids. “I am happy to be free” one said “When people ask me if I want kids I tell them no, then I get so pissed off because they start judging me”.
Never thought about it like that.
What I didn’t like was the fact that they began to openly bash women who decided to become parents as if they lived much better lives than women who had children. Clearly they thought this (nearly) empty locker room was a safe place to say such things but I was still offended none the less.
Whether you love children or you can’t stand them, try not to put judgement on the other side. If you would have told me that I would have been a mom to two very loud, very active boys I would have told you to have a seat. I simply didn’t see it in my future. I didn’t grow up wanting to be a wife and mommy but it happened in its own perfect way.
Life is not easy for either side. Being single, or being a parent doesn’t make the game any easier. We all have out trials and troubles and it is super important to be sensitive to those issues and not think that one demographic has it any better than the other. We can’t make judgments on people for their child bearing choices.
Mommies and non mommies can we all just support each other in this crazy thing called life?